Even the savviest of barflies can’t keep up with some of our local bar hoppers… I have a friend who turned 21 about four months ago. Since he reached that magical age, his life has become a whirlwind of parties, clubs, bars and “keeping up with the gay Joneses.” I mean, this boy doesn’t seem to sleep!

I certainly make it a point to be at all the hot special events, circulate through the scene as appropriate and hit all the right places at the right time, but this kid tried to revoke my Barfly card and tell me he was the true San Diego Barfly. So I gave him a chance to take me on a one-week journey through his nightlife and show me how a true Barfly lives.

We had this discussion on a Sunday afternoon, and I told him we’d start the tour on Monday. He told me that Mondays are reserved for rest (the only night of the week that rest is allowed), but this particular Monday his crew wouldn’t be doing much of that. Somebody broke up with somebody, so there was some story about some need to go out to some bar so somebody could drink away his sorrows of his ex-somebody. Or something like that. The story was quite blurred. But I went along, since I promised to be part of the crew for the week. It was off to the Dating Game at Flicks. This is always a fun night to be at Flicks, as it’s not too packed, but the crowd is fun, and Nicole hosts a great show. One of our crewmates won a great porn video that we all went home and watched around 1:00 a.m.

This particular Tuesday commenced with a trip to Bourbon Street for karaoke with Lori. This was definitely a fun way to start off the evening, and the boys had a good time drinking, flirting and singing. After a couple of hours of karaoke, we hit Numbers. The $2 Coronas were great, and the crowd was fun. The hip-hop and house music kept us moving, and we met a lot of fun people. We stayed at Numbers until closing, and then we were whisked away to some random after-party that one of the crew members had heard about in the bathroom at Numbers.

Hump day is definitely a fun night in San Diego. Whether or not I’m with the crew, I frequently try to make it out to one of my favorite hangouts on Wednesday nights. We started at Bacchus House to catch a bit of Musica y Pasion Latina with Franceska. The drag entertainment and the $2.50 cervezas and margaritas were a great start to the night. But we couldn’t stay long, as we had to make it over to Flicks’ most popular night, known by many as “Welfare Wednesdays.” The $1 well drinks keep the masses tipsy, and everyone enjoys watching “South Park” at 10:00 p.m. We got there at about 10:30, so the crowd was hoppin’ and the drinks were flowin’. Things started to fade at Flicks around midnight, so we headed a few feet up the block to Rich’s for the weekly “Mischief” with Bianca party. We made it just in time for the hot boy contest, and the medium-sized crowd was full of hotties to keep our eyes fixated on.

The unofficial start to the weekend, Thursday, is always an exciting night, I’m told by the crew. They are pumped for the weekend, but get a chance to go out before the big crowds hit the clubs. So off we went! The boys started out this Thursday with a trip to Bacchus House for the fabulous “It’s Raining Men” underwear contest. Tootie is the hostess for one of the hottest wet underwear contests in town. The drinks were flowin’ here, as the well drinks are only $1. Not a bad deal. Afterward, the boys felt like a trip to Lei Lounge was in order, so we headed to University Heights. Lei Lounge is always a beautiful, relaxing spot to sip drinks in the perfect atmosphere. After a few drinks, something amazing happened. A couple of the boys actually were tired. It was quite amazing that they had lasted four days on a total of about 12 hours of sleep. We were home by 12:30, and I actually got some sleep that night.

I woke up quite refreshed on Friday morning. After a day of working, the weekend began! As seems to be a San Diego tradition, the unofficial weekend kick-off party seems to be at the Top of the Park with their famous Friday Happy Hour from 5:00 to 10:00 p.m. The view from the top of the Park Manor Suites hotel is amazing, and the place is always packed and lively. We left around 9:00 p.m. because the boys wanted to get to The Flame before door charging began (there is no cover before 10:00 p.m. on Fridays). While the crowd was still light around 9:30, we had a nice time talking, drinking and swapping tales about how fun the week behind us was (with hints of planning for the next week). Just as people started to pack The Flame, it was time to head over to Rich’s. This club has always been a premier Friday night destination, and we certainly had a great time! We arrived around 11:00 p.m. and were ready to dance our asses off. This went on until Rich’s herded us out at around 1:50 a.m., and the masses crowded the sidewalk in front of 1051 University Ave. Now this was prime time, as “the sidewalk sale” outside of Rich’s is where the news of all the hottest afterhours parties spread. The boys found what was supposed to be the greatest of parties, but I somehow slipped away and went home.

Saturdays are a big night out! For some reason, the crew was disbanded this evening. My friend said it was something about something that everyone was somewhere else. Or something like that. So just my friend and I hit a couple of spots. We started the night out at Bourbon Street for their Boy’s Night Out, then spent the prime hours (11:00 p.m. to 2:00 a.m.) at Numbers, and then hit afterhours at Montage until about 4:00 a.m. We had a great time, but the crew wasn’t there, so the usual drama element was missing (but I’m not complaining).

I was exhausted. I almost didn’t answer the phone when my friend called that morning, but I did, and we started the day with brunch at Urban Mo’s. The restaurant, formerly known as Hamburger Mary’s, still puts out the same fabulous brunch, with flowing champagne and a great crowd. It was a fun morning, followed by a great afternoon nap. A few hours of beauty rest and I was ready to finish off the week. Back to Mo’s it was for the popular Detour party, followed by a hot night of dancing at Bacchus House at their weekly Fiesta Domingo.

Well, it certainly was a fabulous week hitting what felt like every bar that exists. While we really didn’t make it out to all of the wonderful venues in town, we hit the hotspots that seem to make up the circuit. It was a great (and tiring) week, but I think I’m going to stick to my routine of making appearances. It’s just more fabulous that way! Until next time, keep in touch by e-mailing editor@uptownpub.com.