While the Mr. San Diego Leather contestants use those final crucial moments to prepare for their 15 minutes of fame, many are still wondering what we look for in a titleholder. As a contest producer, I believe that’s the question I’m usually asked right after, “Why did he win?” Most people who attend leather contests pick who they want to win in the first round of introductions.

I too am guilty as hell of sitting in the audience and picking who I want to win based on appearances and first impressions. It’s human nature. When we watch the Miss Universe pageant – don’t act like you never watch it – we want the prettiest girl with the best dress to win. That’s all we have to go by, since they all sort of look the same in those swimsuits. Even when we tune into the Eukanuba dog show, we want the fiercest bitch to win. Not bad fierce but “fierce” fierce. Nothing gets us more hyped than a bitch with attitude, and if she’s wearing a dress – even better!

We want beauty with our crowns and no more “saving the world.” Enough is enough! Already we’ve saved whales, dolphins, penguins, bears, trees. Rachel Welch tried to save the dinosaur, “Heroes” saved the cheerleader, white people saved black people from white people, and then the black people saved white people from the black people. After all the saving the world, feeling good and singing “Kumbaya,” we still look at the stage and hope the hottest contestant wins.

If all we, the contest goers, really care about is the guy’s looks, then why is there an interview and speech? So what if he works hard in the community? So what if he has more than one brain cell and can form complete sentences? We’re not interested in sentences. We’re not interested in brain cells. For us intelligence is just a bonus. What we want is a hot guy that can say his name and one of three words: top, bottom or versatile. And if he’s what my business partner calls “hot, hot,” he doesn’t even have to know his name – although top, bottom or versatile is still important.

Gay men give the highest marks for good looks. Whether it’s a beauty queen, a drag queen or a real bitch doesn’t matter to us. We want the hottest one to win, and why not? They’re hot and that’s what happens when you’re hot.

When it comes to representing San Diego to the leather world is “hot” enough? Contrary to popular belief, the Mr. San Diego Leather Contest is not a beauty contest no matter how much we wish it were. Mr. San Diego Leather signs a contract, has duties and must fulfill those duties or be de-sashed. He must produce – not just attend – two charity fund-raisers and two social events. He must chair the leather float committee. He must support local events – within reason. He must travel outside of the area to conferences and workshops. He must be able to answer questions concerning the leather community and leather sex or steer the inquirer in the right direction. All of this may seem like a lot, but he has sponsors, producers and a committee to help him – if he’s smart enough to utilize them. Mr. San Diego Leather is an ambassador, and no where in the definition of ambassador is the word “hot.”

We all want a hot Mr. San Diego Leather. I do, you do and even Mr. San Diego Leather wants a hot Mr. San Diego Leather. The San Diego leather community needs an intelligent Mr. San Diego Leather, who is going to fulfill his duties, represent and make us proud to be San Diego leathermen and women. It takes more than one brain cell to be a successful Mr. San Diego Leather. “Hot” is just a bonus!

The Mr. San Diego Leather Contest and art auction is being held on Saturday, March 17, at Rich’s with a reception at 5 p.m. VIP tickets and more event information can be found at www.mrsandiegoleather.net.

Hope to see you there or “In the Pit,” inthepit@aol.com.